Tuesday's Random Thoughts on Being a Top Wedding Guest
First Looks, Flaming First Dance and Abigail and Alexa Paperback Pub Day
Abigail and Alexa Save the Wedding is officially out in paperback! This book, a USA Today Bestseller, is a social satire of the wedding-industrial complex told from the points of view of the Mother of the Bride and the Mother of the Groom. Two very different women who bond over a shared goal: get those crazy kids married. I love weddings. I love wedding announcements. I loved researching all the wedding etiquette. And I loved creating a world where Abigail and Alexa existed.
Find the paperback here at 20% off or order it through your indie bookstore.
Tuesday’s Random Thoughts on Being a Wedding Guest
Your job as a wedding guest is to RSVP in a timely fashion, note the dress code and adhere, arrive well before the bride walks down the aisle, talk to random cousins who are underdressed, sit when requested, dance when the music starts and thank the parents of the happy couple on the way out even if they didn’t pay for the wedding.
If you object to fulfilling at least 85% of the above list, do everyone a favor and RSVP no. Then, send a decent gift.
The best part of any wedding is when the person at the alter sees their beloved for the first time in their wedding finery. We love the gaze, the tears, the smiles, the promise of it all. Bride & Groom. Groom & Groom. Bride & Bride. Random Thoughts is fine with all these scenarios. But RT is not fine with the staged photographic first looks that takes place before the official walk down the aisle. What are we even doing here if we don’t get to see that moment! You are robbing your guests—and yourselves—of a beautiful memory. Stop it!
Weddings are marathons; plan accordingly: Hydrate ahead of time. Eat a meal before you leave. Put a snack in your bag. Apply sunscreen for outdoor weddings. Consider a hat. Bring a wrap for later. Sacrifice fashion over comfort in terms of footwear. Alternate with sparkling water. Really rethink those shots. Leave it all on the dance floor. Drive or ride share safely.
The toast is not a roast. Keep it short and tasteful.
Nothing is less funny than a toast that mentions exes or drunken escapades.
If your wedding planning budget forces the choice between more appetizers or more party favors, choose appetizers. Your guests will thank you.
The vibe is more important than the aesthetic.
Genuine joy is more important than manufactured rituals.
Attitude is everything in terms of being a great guest.
Support of family and friends is the most important element to any wedding.
My husband and I were guests at a wedding recently where the decorations went up in flames during the Bride and Groom’s first dance and the venue was evacuated. True story. Metaphor? Or unfortunate accident? Hoping the latter.
Cheers,
Lian Dolan
Pasadena, California
A few Book Tour Dates! California and Bend, Oregon!
See website listing for details and tickets
June 7, 20926 at 4 pm
Lian interviews Matt Haig, author of the global bestseller The Midnight Library
Pasadena, California
June 10, 2026 at 6 Pm
Book Launch at Azusa Public Library
Refreshments, talk, book signing, funn
Please join me! Azusa, California
July 30 at 7 pm
Roundabout Books
Bend , Oregon